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Samstag, 26. Mai 2012

The Shadow



It wasn't bigger than a spider, but it freaked the hell out of me. At first I figured it had to be an insect but it was snowing outside, so this couldn't be.... right before sunset, I caught a glimpse of it in the light:... legs beyond counting and when it started to move I could hear it scramble over the floor. *tick* *tick* *tick**tick*... the noise of it's legs....it wasn't a spider, but it wasn't a real insect either.

I can't remember why I stayed inside the room. Maybe I thought I could handle it, I could catch it with one of my coffee mugs and put it outside (or loosen it on my roommate). For a while there was nothing; no sound, no crawling - nothing. The sun had set and I was just lying on my bed.... I was so tired. Every time I tried to get up my body grew a little weaker, up until the point where I couldn't move at all. I expected it. I waited for it to crawl over my face, just when I was too tired to move. But nothing happened - although one thing happened: After the sun had set, somebody locked me in. Twisted the key, once, twice, three times .... and then, after his footsteps faded down the hallway, everything went silent.

"Are you afraid of this thing in your room?"

"No, I figured out it's a dream... I just missed my bus three times this night, and now you come along with a .... I don't know what it's called - whatever you loosened in my room."

"Why blame me? Your dream, your rules, your shadow. I never set it loose. You should be able to move."

"I should be.... I can't though...."

And suddenly a madness hit me. How can I wake up? I tried but I couldn't... caught in a nightmare... I stared at the ceiling with my eyes wide open. I tried to open them beyond "open", so far that I might wake up from it, but it didn't do.... couldn't shout - had no voice.... couldn't move my hands, my legs... caught in a nightmare... as if someone was smiling in my room, but I couldn't see his face... so I'm lucid and mentally sound, and yet it doesn't change a thing. "Bring it on", I thought... "Bring on the whole fucking show...."

I had forgotten this dream until just now, but I remember it going on for hours... at least it felt like hours...I wonder how many people are caught in a nightmare somewhere.... unable to wake up, unable to move....

Well. At least I was able to make your day a little brighter with a happy anecdote.

S.M

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