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Mittwoch, 12. Februar 2014

Day 33-34: LA Nights


It's funny how my mind sometimes decides when it's time to sleep. Apparently I have no say in this whatsoever. He wants me to sleep from 4:00 am until 13:00 pm, but unfortunately that causes a conflict with my working hours. Ever since last weekend (the weekend I slept for hours during the daytime) my day/night rhythm is completely off ... and it's starting to scare the crap out of me, because the work keeps piling up and I still have two weeks of work ahead of me.

So I'm just lying there, looking at the ceiling, listening to the air conditioning. And the hundreds of songs I heard keep ringing in my ears... it's not the first time though. One of the reasons I wanted to be a composer was the fact, that I could choose and switch my working hours based on a whim. No boundaries, no rules, no schedule, just a to-do list and lots of time.

We had a pitch with an 80.000$ budget today and that pitch killed me, because if I had brought my equipment, I could have easily worked on it and sent them a perfect track. Instead I was browsing the database for another lucky composer. When I went home I got Thai food from my favorite place again... I always tip the delivery guy 20%, but they keep messing up my order, sending it out too late or overcharging me. If the food wasn't so damn good, I could just go out and look for another place... but I tried seven different ethnic food restaurants in the area and these guys are the best...

I keep watching a lot of interviews at night ... Conan O Brien, Louis CK, Kevin Spacey, Bryan Cranston... these are all people I admire and they all had to work for decades to get where they are. But I sometimes wonder if it really makes a difference. I guess I just want to make a living out of it, so that none of this matters. Fall asleep at 4:30? Doesn't matter. Chose to skip a day of work? Doesn't matter. Chose to work 14 hours straight? Doesn't matter.

It is now 12:35 am. And I am wide awake. More awake than I was today at noon. A lot more awake. Beautiful.

S.M


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